Sunday, December 31, 2006

When The Smart Ass Attitude You Learned From Mom Goes Terribly Wrong

My daughter Lauren is 8, and the girl has snark and zing - and she is QUICK. She even gets me sometimes...I'm so proud.

For instance, my beautiful and precious angel bear (Lauren) was watching the boob tube yesterday and her room was a manifestation of hell.

"Lauren, you need to clean your room honey. It's scary in there."

"No I don't. It's not scary enough yet."

"Oh it's plenty scary, and you had better get moving before you upset me instead of sitting there giving me lip."

"Lip? What do you want one of my lips for?" She asks this with a totally innocent look on her face - like she didn't know what I was talking about.

"You're pushing your limits Lauren. This is the last time I'm telling you - go clean your room - or I'm going to wear you out."

"Okay - you can if you want. I've got buns of steal"

.......

Turns out, buns of steal or no buns of steal, they still hurt when Mom gets ahold of em.

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26 Comments:

At Sunday, December 31, 2006 2:50:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ha ha ha!!!

 
At Sunday, December 31, 2006 4:24:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah - I think it's the after-Christmas letdown. After all that effort "being good", the kids just seem to go into the new year being totally bad. My smart-ass-mouthed boy is spending the next hour alone in his room if he doesn't shut his trap in two seconds.

 
At Sunday, December 31, 2006 4:53:00 PM, Anonymous Annie said...

So, did she clean her room?!

Happy New Year, Nikki!

 
At Sunday, December 31, 2006 8:48:00 PM, Blogger carmachu said...

I hear you. ALL my friends here sarah's comments and one liners, whether their online or in real life.

ALL of them tell me I'm *so* in trouble when she gets older....

I'm so excited and so proud. I cant wait.....oh the fun that will be had!

 
At Sunday, December 31, 2006 9:29:00 PM, Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

LMAO that's awesome!

Happy New Year, my friend!

 
At Monday, January 01, 2007 10:53:00 AM, Blogger Dr Joseph McCrumble said...

Happy New Year Nikki

May your house be blessed by peace and obedient children throughout 2007 and beyond.

 
At Monday, January 01, 2007 1:05:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love it when the little ones get put in their place.

 
At Monday, January 01, 2007 1:54:00 PM, Blogger Pendullum said...

Geez the acorn does not fall far from da' tree!!!
So,Lauren did you bite your momma's ass????
or did you clean up your scary room??

 
At Monday, January 01, 2007 3:16:00 PM, Anonymous kim said...

*snickers more* cute arent they?

 
At Monday, January 01, 2007 5:30:00 PM, Anonymous quinn said...

hahahah...cute kid..
happy new year

 
At Monday, January 01, 2007 5:50:00 PM, Blogger Nikki said...

OTJ - you can laugh now....but the Mayor will put you in your place soon enough LOL

Sayre - and yet..we love them LOL

Annie - her room looks fabulous.

Carm - people used to tell me the same thing...foreshadowing for you perhaps?

Mr Fab - long time no see stranger, and Happy New Year to you too.

Dr McC - Thank you. ...and may you and your house be blessed with a happy healthy baby in the New Year. Please tell Dolores I said hello and I wish her the best.

Chicky - I can't say that I enjoy hitting my daughter, and it bothers me that you love it. What are you? Some sort of sick fuck?

Pend - oh you know the room is clean girlie. LOL

Kim - she is *ahem* mostly.

Quinn - Happy New Year to you too woman.

 
At Monday, January 01, 2007 9:11:00 PM, Blogger Attila The Mom said...

:::snarf::::

Wishing you the best for 2007!

 
At Tuesday, January 02, 2007 10:29:00 AM, Anonymous nikki said...

Aaron likes to tell me I need wedgies. Smart ass.

 
At Tuesday, January 02, 2007 11:36:00 AM, Anonymous Jeff said...

I don't have kids yet, but dogs do the same thing. It is amazing! :)

 
At Tuesday, January 02, 2007 2:19:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is this a case of We teach them to talk then live to regret it??? LOL

Happy New Year!

 
At Tuesday, January 02, 2007 9:23:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not sick I just like it when they get their bluff pulled, like they think they have the upper hand.

 
At Tuesday, January 02, 2007 10:32:00 PM, Blogger carmachu said...

Definate foreshadowing. My one friend with 4 girls says she's more of a smartass then her 14 year old.

I guess that means REAL trouble....


Good luck. And here's hoping she doesnt stick a book down the back of her pants the next time you spank her....

 
At Wednesday, January 03, 2007 9:41:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG, she is soooooooo related to my spawn daughters. Did she run upstairs from you giggling too?

 
At Wednesday, January 03, 2007 2:06:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOL - I can laugh now...I'll be crying later.

 
At Wednesday, January 03, 2007 2:06:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOL - I can laugh now...I'll be crying later.

 
At Wednesday, January 03, 2007 4:05:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

*LOL snort*
OMG I thik this is when the "board of education" was "applied to the seat of my problem"...Snarky did not win my any points in our house! I got paddled one time so hard that I had bruises! Talk about scaring me for LIFE!!!

Then again...I didn't do it again...AHHH confusious say, lesson learned! Instant knowledge!

 
At Wednesday, January 03, 2007 8:05:00 PM, Blogger JennyJinx said...

Mwahahaha! I love it! Lil' Miss is the same way with her mouth, but I give her "the look" and she knows it's time to shut it up. Practice "the look" and it'll be a lot less painful (if you're lucky- which sometimes I'm not)... Ok, shutting up now.

 
At Thursday, January 04, 2007 12:23:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow. She IS quick with that wit! I love the buns of steel. I wish I had some of those!

 
At Thursday, January 04, 2007 3:39:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Some peoples kids!

Hey glad your back!

 
At Thursday, January 04, 2007 10:03:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hee hee lol.

 
At Friday, January 05, 2007 8:42:00 AM, Blogger Nikki said...

Attila - you to.

Nikki - but does he give them to you?

Jeff - I love my animals like my children too.

CeCe - this is a perfect example of the phrase parents always hear...We the first few years trying to get them to walk and talk, and we spend the rest of our lives trying to get them to sit down and shut up.

Chicky - She does try to have the upper hand sometimes...but she's no different from any other kid I'd suspect. ....and I do call her bluff from time to time, just like she calls mine sometimes. She's a cool kid - she just has to learn when it's okay to joke around and get lippy - something that I have no problem with as long as it's done respectfully and in fun..she'll learn.

Carm - LMAO you just brought back a memory of me when I was about 6 or 7 and mom was getting ready to spank me (I had to sit on the couch for a few minutes and wait for it)...I snuck a magazine down the back side of my pants...and got caught...mom went and got the belt after that....it was such a bad day for me. LOL.

Christina - no, we don't have stairs LOL, she just sat in the chair looking at me with that smirky expression on her face. LOL

Dirty - oh you know you will girl, but by the time you hit this stage....I'll be entering the teenage years with her..and if you wouldn't mind going ahead and starting to pray for me now, I'd appreciate it. Thanks.

Super - ouch girl, ouch.

Jenny - girl, I had the look, the hands on hips and and her daddy was in the chair beside her glaring at her...she just wanted to see how far she could go...not very far apparently LOL. When she was smaller, I could avoid spanking her by telling her "Lauren, you're getting ready to have a bad day." She knew after that - I was gonna whup her ass LOL

Kristen - Me to girl, Buns of steal are better than abs of flab LOL

 

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