10 Things About Me to Confuse You

1. I love practical jokes. Not the kind where you get a bucket of water dumped on your head, there's nothing funny about that unless you've been swimming and are already all wet - I'm not totally hateful - just mostly hateful.
2. I have a scar from a bullet on my upper thigh... just kidding.
3. I enjoy my own humor. A.k.a., I laugh at my own jokes, which to most people is bad manners. I don't get that. Why would you make a joke that you don't laugh at? Laugh for crying out loud. Laughter is good. I will laugh with you and at you. I will laugh at myself first because well, I'm funnier than you. No really, joking aside, I don't feel that you should be able to laugh at anyone or anything unless you are able to laugh at yourself first.
4. I dislike stupid people, elitist asses, and drama queen/kings equally.
5. I feel uncomfortable expressing my emotions unless I am talking to my immediate family. Otherwise, it comes out as a joke. Yes, I know, bad form, but what can ya do?
6. When I had my daughter 8 years ago, I didn't even know how to change a diaper or hold a baby. I wish I could describe the nurses faces from the delivery room when one of them asked me if I wanted to hold her and I told her I didn't know how.
7. I am currently trying to expand my horizons. One of the ways I am doing this is by visiting various different types of blogs. I like the fact that I get that personal feed back from most of them and some good debates and conversation come from them as well.
8. I have a bad temper and show it to just about everyone except my children. I'm working on fixing that. My mother told me a while back that I should control my temper and not let it control me. Even I can not deny the truth and wisdom in those words. I am having a hard time balancing that with when I feel like someone is insulting me or doing me wrong in someway. I have a hard time not cussing them out on the spot. I am trying to get my brain to shift into a mode where I can tell them off without cussing them out - rather than giving them the standard - GO FUCK YOURSELF - BITE ME DIPSHIT - or the ever popular - SIT ON IT AND SPIN DICKHEAD. And no, I do not have a problem with confrontation, though I rarely instigate it.
9. My father died when I was 9 from a brain tumor. I have some memories of him, mostly of when he was sick - radiation, chemotherapy, 3 different surgeries. I feel cheated. I have a lot I would like to talk to him about.
10. I LOVE classical music like Bach and Mozart, enjoy some opera, love ballet and believe classical guitar is the best thing ever.