Friday, March 16, 2007

I'm A Bad, Bad Mommy

Let it not be said that I discriminate. I enjoy torturing all members of my family regardless of age or sex, because I'm an equal opportunist like that.

When Lauren was smaller - about 4 or so I guess, we took her to the Olive Garden after being duly lectured on behavior in a pubic in a very nice restaurant. Why not? She knew how to act in public places, and I had won a gift card for a free dinner so we went.

We were seated in a booth, cool glasses of water by our hands, warm crusty bread in a basket and the waiter comes to our table for our order. To be honest, we hadn't really looked at the menu. We had gotten caught up talking about everything - since we rarely saw each other with our work hours.....and this would be the 3rd time that the waiter has come to our table.


Waiter - Have you decided on what you'll be having this evening?

I look at Charles, he looks at me, I pick up the menu and he shrugs.

Charles - You have steak?

Waiter - Yes sir

Charles - I'll have one of those, medium well please.

They go over the choices for side items and the Waiter turns and looks at me expectantly.

Me - I'd like (what ever it was that I had ordered)

Waiter - And what would the little lady like madam?

I looked at Lauren, she looked at me and shrugged her shoulders.

Lauren - what do they have?

I looked at the waiter.

Waiter - we have hamburgers, chicken noodle soup, chicken fingers....

Lauren - Chicken Fingers?

Me - Yes baby. You like them.

Lauren - No way*shakes head firmly*....and chickens don't even have fingers.

Me - Yes they do Lauren. How else do you think they pick up the worms?

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19 Comments:

At Friday, March 16, 2007 3:21:00 PM, Blogger Sayre said...

I must torture my son because that's exactly the kind of thing I would say!

My boy learned the skeptical look very early in life and puts it on when he thinks I'm pulling his leg. (he's usually right);)

 
At Friday, March 16, 2007 3:29:00 PM, Blogger Heather said...

SNARF!!!
Thanks Nikki, I laughed at that, but hubbie just snarfed all over the keyboard....
Worth it!

 
At Friday, March 16, 2007 4:03:00 PM, Blogger Superstar said...

*giggles*
That is so something my #1 niece would say!
LOL ;o)

Kinda like the time I asked her to put her panties on and she did...

ON HER HEAD!

*snickers*

 
At Friday, March 16, 2007 4:50:00 PM, Anonymous jennyjinx said...

Wahahahaha! You are my kind of mom. Honestly, I heard stories like that all through my childhood and have tortured Lil' Miss relentlessly all of hers. They made for some good memories, I'll tell ya.

Thanks for the laugh.:)

 
At Friday, March 16, 2007 5:01:00 PM, Blogger Stinkypaw said...

GOod one! Thanks for the laughs!

 
At Saturday, March 17, 2007 1:48:00 AM, Blogger Diesel said...

Chickens do have nuggets though, right?

 
At Saturday, March 17, 2007 8:54:00 AM, Blogger carmachu said...

I torture sarah all the time. Builds character.

Granted I hate to be her teacher in a couple of years.

 
At Saturday, March 17, 2007 2:53:00 PM, Blogger Factor 10 said...

lol-When Big O was learning to read, he wigged out on me at Jack in the Box because he saw that they had Monster Tacos.

 
At Sunday, March 18, 2007 8:55:00 AM, Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

I thought they used one of those sticks like people who pick litter up use...

 
At Sunday, March 18, 2007 11:06:00 AM, Anonymous kim said...

*snickers* shes gonna be just like her mamma

 
At Sunday, March 18, 2007 5:36:00 PM, Blogger Pendullum said...

Ohhh Nikki...
Well, my husband told our daughter that our friendly butcher had pigs in wheelchairs in the basement of his establishment, as they, the pigs, donated their hooves for someone's dinner.

 
At Monday, March 19, 2007 11:23:00 AM, Blogger mollymcmo said...

i lurvvvvve chicken fingers!
thats something my kids would say too! LOL!

m

 
At Monday, March 19, 2007 2:46:00 PM, Blogger mamatulip said...

*snort*

 
At Monday, March 19, 2007 4:25:00 PM, Blogger Rainman said...

That poor kid will forever be scared of chickens. She will probably end up telling one of her teachers how chickens have fingers and pick up worms. The teacher will say no honey they dont have fingers. she will then say "Ya Ha, my mom said so!"

 
At Monday, March 19, 2007 8:25:00 PM, Anonymous Mommie Dearest said...

Lauren's Grandaddy said: Chickens have fingers; Roosters have Nuggets! Cluck! Cluck!

 
At Tuesday, March 20, 2007 11:36:00 AM, Blogger Amy W said...

Totally going to use that one! Thanks for making me laugh at work!

 
At Tuesday, March 20, 2007 1:31:00 PM, Blogger Dirty Birdie said...

LOL - of course chickens have fingers....ha ha ha ha ha. Does that mean all fish have sticks??

 
At Wednesday, March 21, 2007 10:10:00 AM, Anonymous Jeff said...

Some of the more extreme of us are still excited when the chicken "strips".

 
At Thursday, March 22, 2007 11:55:00 AM, Blogger Attila The Mom said...

hehehehe. Adorable!

 

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