In Case You Were Wondering.....
Being a woman does not make me less than a man.
I will not submit to you. I don't care if you are a woman or a man.
I will not jump if you want something to drink or eat or anything else. I will step quickly and with motivation if you need toilet paper...simply because you not having any grosses me out though you probably deserve to go without it.
I am not your bitch. I am not your slave. I am not your super woman....though I do have the power to cuss a blue streak and piss off everyone in my immediate vicinity - which I have displayed on many occasions.
I will not use the excuse "I can't because I'm a girl."...and if I hear you trying to teach that crap to my daughter again, I will forget that you are my husbands mother and let you have it....we've spoken about this before. I will not "speak" to you about it again.
I don't want to hear you snickering while I'm splitting wood. Granted, I probably look ridiculous doing it, but that's not what you're snickering about. You're snickering because you think it's funny that I'M splitting splitting wood....but I'd bet my bottom dollar that you'd have something to say if I didn't.
Do not make me feel like the bad guy when my children need to be disciplined.
Do not make snide remarks when I put my dishes in the dishwasher instead of washing them by hand.
Do not give my side long glances when I hang my clothes up or put them in the dryer. If I do it one way, you think it should be done another.
Don't play the poor suffering woman with me. You're a manipulative old bat that's tough as shoe leather.
To be clear...there's basically one thing you're allowed to do when you come to my house....
LEAVE.
Labels: Nikki bites
Nikki Stank Up The Room @ 8:14 PM
101 Brown Nosers
101 Comments:
I love it. We may have the same mother in law. Though mine never comes to my house, thank God.
OMG you are here !
thanks for comming to visit.
I will have to put you back on my favorites...
im good by the way .
thanks for asking.
Amen to that. I have some issues with my "outlaws".
Good for you! Welcome back.
Can I tell you how happy I am that I no longer have a POS MIL to deal with anymore?! I do feel for you, my former MIL was exactly how you described!
Thanks for getting in touch the other day although the jury is still out on whether or not I liked being called a crackhead. ;)
Oh the holiday's are here, aren't they? Oh joh. {{hugs}}
Oh sweetie, maybe we should introduce her to Mrs Beeton, I'm sure they would get along famously. Or alternatively just do what I do when Mrs Beeton starts to P**s me off, I just imagine picking my dainty littl hooter and wiping the biggest bogie ever down the front of her posh frock. It makes me smile and she thinks I'm more saintly than ever ;0}
My MIL lives 2000 miles away from me. Just thought I would let you know. ;)
Oooohhhh sorry. I didn't realize my Monster-in-law has started visiting you.
Even though I may snicker while watching a woman chop wood ... I must admit I find it kind of sexy. And the bonus is that now I don't have to do it ... so chop away!
Ooooohhhh, the MIL rant. I would TOTALLY do this but my MIL actually visits my blog.
*shudders at the thought*
Thanks for saying all the things I'm usually thinking.
Amen, amen.
Couldn't agree with you more. Dont let the door hit your arse on the way out!
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WELL DONE!!
Totally agree with you
Hope you have a wonderful holiday!
XOXO
ATM
Haha! I love it! This may be my "Word To Live By" for 2008.
Where you at?
xoxo
Miss uuuuuuuuuu!!!!
That was some funny shit right there. Now we want to know the outcome of this, where are you?
I just found your blog. You made me laugh. I had the best MIL in the world. She passed away 2 years ago and I will always miss her. I like your blog but I'm kind of scared of your anonymous comment. Yikes! I do like your blog though. I'm glad that I found it! Hang in there!
Hello. This post is likeable, and your blog is very interesting, congratulations :-). I will add in my blogroll =). If possible gives a last there on my blog, it is about the Livros e Revistas, I hope you enjoy. The address is http://livros-e-revistas.blogspot.com. A hug.
That's the way life is with mothers-in-law. Of course they want to make you look bad, it's because they aren't getting enough, if any attention from anyone that's why they look for it from your children.
Age does weird things to people.
Well I'm still wondering...
Where the hell are you?
xo
I'm with ATM! Did your MIL make you not want to blog anymore? Come back to the blog! You crack me up!!
Ugh...I'm going to stay with mine for a week next month...
But they like me :)
Missing you and Christina the Wench...
Both of you have dropped out of the Bloggersphere...
Miss you both!
Holy crap I think we have the same mother in law.
Goodness, that sounds terrible! Good on you - girls can (and do) do everything. The other day my roommate told me I walked like a girl. I am still not sure what that means - but I am pretty sure I shouldn't stand for that nonsense.
Hey guys I'm not dead. Ill probably be back this year
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